The immobile me wanted to be mobile as soon as possible. And that reminds me about my Mobile phone. Who wanted to look at it. All those games and serials and social networking were not helping at all. Nothing gave me comfort. How can they. They are my own self created miseries. Extra workload. That can easily be done away with. What a relief you get when you don't have to bother about any call for four days. That's called freedom when you are free for only yourself and unavailable to the rest.
And food was most irritating part. Suddenly I had developed strong aversion for all kind of sugar, salt, spice. Biscuits tasted too sweet. Lays tasted too salty. Awww all nauseated me. All I wanted was simple plain water. Simple basic food. No flavours. I thought I was back to my original nature as a human being. My illness had reconnected me to my original true nature. Technology has brought about varous savoury dishes but nothing beats simple home made food with minimum ingredients possible. I could taste actual flavour of my food from whatever I could eat.
All types of food smell was nauseating but when husband got fresh tube roses and placed it in a vase on table, that was the sweetest smell. I felt so refreshed and healing. No wonder they used to bring flowers for sick in old days. Now a days, its all together different story. People give and receive bouquets but who cares. I wonder if bride and groom or their families even notice those bouquets they receive on the wedding day. Now this is going off track.
Four days of confinement in home, in my bed with my and only my thoughts, in between those medicines induced sleep spells and in company of my severe body pain and burning head, I was only with myself. I think I was enjoying my own company so much since now I could get a complete overview of what all I had been doing. So much. So much of everything. So much eating, so much socialising, so much texting, so much Mobile and so much unnecessary work. It was a good time to review and revise my prorities. I was busy in doing things that were serving no purpose. Wasting my time in stupid technical gadgets and social calls. I had to cut it down drastically. Shed that extra potato load and feel lighter. And I had been thinking I wasn't doing anything worth while all these years. Now I realise how wrong I had been. We normally and casually judge ourselves in such negative manner. Because all solutions are in us, provided we ask ourselves instead of running to phone and start seeking advice outside. Check with the counsellor within. It has all solutions.
Honestly I am thankful as I recuperate my illness left me more wiser. It connected myself to REAL me. So much so that it made me start writing once again. I think I really needed this shake up. What a relief it is to be able to do restart your life after this forced rest with fresh positive outlook.
Vandana Ritik Mulchandani
Noida
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